print version

September 2006

Creating boundaries ‑‑ Part 1

by Dr. Kevin Pallis and Dr. Ed Plentz

This has been a much anticipated and much debated topic.

"If I don't give patients what they want (symptomatic relief with no patient education) they'll leave me." "People will only come to me with back pain." "The inmates are running the asylum." These are all variants of the same theme: a lack of belief in yourself and chiropractic.

What you don't realize is that, until you create an emotional bond with your patients, there can be no patient education. Your patients will continue to come to your office and tell you what to do. What's really needed are boundaries ‑‑ and a firm love for a planet that thirsts for true leadership.

Everyone wants to establish boundaries in the doctor‑patient relationship... but how? One of the easiest ways is to clearly identify yourself as a leader, not a follower. A leader says what needs to be said because he or she is the only doctor in the conversation.

Followers are very much interested in how fellow followers feel about them. Leaders speak with an authority that mirrors their confidence in themselves. The beautiful part of creating boundaries is that it's a universal law. It happens naturally unless you interfere with it. You need to be firm and loving without giving in to the temptation to use force, manipulation or deception.

A leader sets boundaries and a follower observes boundaries. You can feel the emotional connection (or lack of it) with each practice member who enters your office. What rank you graduated, what you look like, the kind of carpet you have in your office ‑‑ all this flies out the window when you're knee‑to‑knee with a patient. All that matters is your belief in yourself, your belief in chiropractic and your communication skills.

Your practice members can sense if you're a little too eager to help them or if you need their money. They can also sense if you have a genuine urgency, a fire in your gut to help them discover more of their human potential and the opportunity to express it. Questions your practice members ask you aren't what they appear to be. They don't care about the answers. They want you to re‑clarify your relationship with them.

When a practice member makes a remark about your fees, do you really think he or she had no idea about them? How did the person get to your office? The reality is that someone referred the individual, he or she knows your fees, and most likely has already called his or her insurance company to verify coverage, if any.

In the relationship arena, questions will continue until you learn to speak the other person's language. Strong relationships are the result of strong communication. Weak communication kills relationships ‑‑ professional as well as personal.

When your practice members query you about fees, distance, time, frequency, ad nauseum, don't answer their questions. If you're sighing at this advice and insisting that you must answer in order to appear "professional," welcome to a small practice of back‑cracking and non‑chiropractic income‑producing activities. The same people answer their partners repeated requests for things on a "honey do" list. The old list just keeps getting replaced by a new one and you live under that rock for your entire life.

There's no need for a list. What you focus on becomes your reality. Learn to set boundaries with your patients. It's not a script, it's a thought construct to help you form emotional connections with your practice members. And it's the closest thing to ending silly questions once and for all.

The time to distinguish ourselves from others is now. We need to clearly identify ourselves as family chiropractors and let people decide for themselves if our offices fit their health care goals and needs.

Inspire, love, educate and create boundaries for your patients and your practice will be a joy for you and for them.

(The New Renaissance is a movement of passionate chiropractors dedicated to changing the world. The leader in patient education since 1977, the Mentor IV Coaching Program is a step‑by‑step navigational guide that embodies the very essence of The New Renaissance vision of healthier people creating a healthier world. Without patient education, your patients won't "get it." To learn more about The New Renaissance, contact world headquarters at 800‑525‑3879.)