March 2007

What drives you?

by Dr. Dennis Nikitow

The other day, my second son Luke, a college sophomore, gave some profound advice to my fourth son Jordan.

Jordan was selected to participate in an advanced honors program in middle school. Jordan, being extremely intelligent, concluded, "Why should I go into an extremely hard honors program when I could stay with all the other kids and pull straight A's without much effort?" After my wife and I spent over 90 minutes with him going over scriptural passages and principles, trying to talk to him with NLP communication strategies and using parent/child repositioning, Luke simply but eloquently asked him, "Are you only seeing the adversity or have you considered the opportunity?

After getting up off the floor, I sat back down and said, "Wow, chiropractors need to hear this too!"

Which one drives you? Take a moment to look at your life, the actions you take and the choices you make. Have they been based on opportunity or adversity?

If you're running back and forth putting out fires, feeling overwhelmed and stressed, you're at "effect" and probably making decisions based strictly on the adversity.

On the other hand, if you're setting goals, taking specific action steps toward achieving them in an organized fashion, and focusing on what you want to achieve, you're at "cause" and probably seeking to make and choose opportunities.

Adversity is a normal part of life. It can help us grow in character, by learning how to persevere through it. Adversity can be the very thing that makes you a success.

If you're familiar with the stories of Thomas Edison, Col. Sanders or even Sylvester Stallone, you'll see the blessings of adversity, the persistence of human nature and the strengthening of character through perseverance. There are many other examples, but the common thread in all of these people is they saw opportunity in the adversity, and we were the beneficiaries.

The point is, adversity will always be a part of our lives but where do you focus? If you focus only on the adversity and put energy into it, you will get more of it, and never see the opportunity. You attract what you focus on because you apply actions towards your focus.

I've been there. Sometimes problems are so enormous that it's hard to see around them, but you must look at them as a growing, learning experience to make you better. One thing to remember is you will never be given a problem bigger than you can handle. Look at your past history, and revisit some you thought you'd never overcome. Yet, you did.

So, how can you overcome adversity and turn it into opportunity?

First, consciously acknowledge there'll always be adversity in the path of achieving anything in life.

Next, confront it. Never run from it or avoid it. Ask yourself some questions: "How can this possibly be helping me? What can I learn from this? How can this make me better? What changes do I need to make to achieve what I desire?" This will change your focus.

Remember, strong character is built out of overcoming adversity, not when things are always going smoothly. Reestablish your focus on your goals and desires. If you truly want to achieve your goals, practice persistence. Don't give up. Pray, meditate, visualize, seek others to help, but keep focused on the goal.

Evaluate your action steps and your results. What could you change that may bring you closer to your goal? How could the adversity become an opportunity? If you continue to ask these empowering questions the empowering answers will show up and you will succeed.

The answers may be just around the corner, but many people give up too soon. Sometimes you're pushing down one road, and God's plan is to go down another for greater success. You would think it's a mistake if you're focusing on adversity, but if you look for the opportunity, you suddenly see it.

This happened to me as I originally chose optometry as my field. I suffered from headaches and back pain, which lead me to a chiropractor's office. When my lifelong asthma disappeared, I was overtaken with excitement, curiosity, and a desire to understand more about chiropractic and why no one had introduced it to me earlier on in my life.

Out of adversity, I saw the opportunity to help others as I was helped. I had a burning desire to prove to the world that chiropractic was solid philosophically and scientifically, and to teach chiropractors how to communicate this message to the public with certainty. I wanted people to know what I didn't, and to not suffer the way I had. This burning desire was the opportunity in the adversity of my own suffering. It helped me view future adversity as a blessing versus a blight. So, from personal experience, I would like to suggest that your adversity may be the turning point in your life for success.

Oh, and by the way, thanks Luke for taking one minute to make the change in Jordan that I couldn't make in 90 minutes. Jordan's on his way to the honors program. Isn't it amazing how powerful the right communication can be?

(To learn about the Certainty System, Certainty Practice Products and Dr. Dennis Nikitow's upcoming seminar schedule, call 800‑544‑3884. Outside the US, 303‑721‑6202.)