May 2007

Lifetime relationship building

by Dr. Eric Plasker

If you knew you'd live to 100, how would you change your life? Would you make more friends, exercise more, save more, visit your chiropractor more regularly, change your retirement plan?

The fact is, centenarians are one of the fastest‑growing segments of the population in the United States, and the chance of you becoming one is growing by leaps and bounds. In my new book ("The 100 Year Lifestyle"), I talk about how to strategically plan for and embrace this miraculous longevity we've been given. Will you be prepared or will you outlive your assets, your career and your social network?

One of my favorite mantras is lifetime relationships mean lifetime business. We sustain our means of making a living by constantly creating new relationships and maintaining the ones we have. Maintaining our contact network is essential for career building and supporting our area of business. My network of friends and colleagues stretches around the world.

Increased longevity means that many of us will end up working longer, and often as new entrepreneurs. According to an article at AgeTimes.com, a study revealed that Americans aged 55 to 64 and older represent one of the fastest‑growing groups of self‑employed workers. Do you want to reach 100 alone or with a strong network? What steps can you take today to create a network of business and personal contacts that will last you a century?

One of the greatest fears and challenges of aging is loneliness. Unfortunately, many seniors experience more funerals than birthday parties. The imbalance between celebrations and sadness can lead to depression and hopelessness for many seniors. Loss is going to be a reality of our extended life spans. The longer you live, the more loss you will experience. If you only have one circle of friends, or one friend, you will recover more slowly from significant loss.

The more circles you have, and the more places in which you are meaningfully connected, the easier it is going to be for you to enjoy your longevity. You will be more able to cope with loss and stay passionately engaged in life. Building relationships with three, four, even five generations of people balances you and stimulates your youthfulness. When you maintain relationships across generations, you stay in touch with a radically changing world. It keeps you active and your senses young and sharp.

As we age and accumulate responsibilities, we interact with more and more people. It can seem smart to drop relationships when we don't have the time to sustain them. All friendships aren't worth having and things will change from time to time. Understand that healthy relationships are adaptive. You should always be able to connect with the world, and the people in your world, in a way that is authentic. We must maintain relationships throughout our lives to make them worth living.

We shouldn't let go of potential advantageous connections with people simply because we can't muster the time and energy for a cup of coffee every few months. Study after study has shown that strong social relationships are essential for a healthy mind and body, while they also enhance our life experience. They reduce some of the bad effects of stress, and help speed recovery from psychological and physical illness.

We need relationships with many different types of people to expand our worldview and global perspective. Staying involved and constantly meeting new people will feed your business and expand your circle for a lifetime. Continue to add people to your life who support the healthiest side of you. Do the things that you need to do for yourself and you'll discover that you have so much more to give to your relationships.

Be honest about who you are, and what you want. Your willingness to let your voice be heard will give you the opportunity to make the rest of your life the best.

(Internationally known wellness expert Dr. Eric Plasker, is a speaker, educator and TV & radio personality. His company, The Family Practice, helped chiropractors grow their practices by more than $25 million last year. His debut book, "The 100‑Year Lifestyle: Dr. Eric Plasker's Breakthrough Solution for Living Your Best Life ‑‑ Every Day of Your Life" is available in major bookstores and at Amazon.com. Visit www.thefamilypractice.net and www.100yearlifestyle.com)