October 2007

The power of compassion

by Dr. Kevin Pallis and Dr. Ed Plentz

When asked if they consider themselves compassionate, many of our readers are quick to respond, "of course." Let's look below the surface and see if this is indeed true.

Compassion is the ability to understand and comprehend others' suffering and misfortune. The beauty of the power of compassion is that it allows us to appreciate what a person is going through. In the chiropractic arena, our practice members often find themselves in very difficult situations. Do you really listen to where your practice member is coming from? Or do you talk at them and attempt to educate them about chiropractic without first showing your compassion for them?

Many of your current and potential practice members find themselves in challenging circumstances. Perhaps it's an aging parent, marital issues, a feeling of unworthiness, an ill child, or the ever‑pressing financial pressures. When practice members worry about these issues, often they're physically present but not mentally there. Sure, they nod their heads in agreement. Yet, they are unable to process a new concept because they're preoccupied with their troubles. And, after a few visits, they're gone.

They didn't feel your compassion for them. When other human beings feel you're connected to them and have their genuine interests at heart, they warm up to you and let down their guard. You begin to make an emotional connection with them and then ‑‑and only then ‑‑ will they allow you to educate them.

Compassion is like a laser beam, cutting through practice members' indifference, boredom, low expectations. Once you realize that your practice members have very low expectations of you and of your office, you will see that until you have communicated your compassion for them and their circumstances, you'll be forced to meet their low expectations. This is the recipe for disaster that many DCs find themselves experiencing ‑‑ not knowing how to educate those practice members who only want to talk symptoms. This is what takes the fun out of practice, and out of life.

Couple practice members' low expectations with being let down by other health professionals and that's your next practice member. It's no wonder so many DCs don't want to educate their practice members. The rejection rate can be high... that is, if they don't feel your compassion. Like a parent, as a DC you are faced with a choice of either giving practice members what they want (symptom relief) or giving them what they need (a compass of health).

Compassion for others is dependant on having compassion for yourself. If you have a love of chiropractic and a high self‑image, you are able to convey compassion quite easily. If you don't have the highest good of your practice members foremost in your heart, there is no compassion. It's replaced by the self‑interest of what's in it for me? To practice members, you're being a salesperson. Along with the requisite scripts and closing techniques, marketing and selling is devoid of compassion, which leads to short‑term relationships and leaves both parties with an unquenched thirst of is that all there is?

When you have compassion for people, you feel an interconnectedness with everybody. People respond in a positive way to you. You feel yourself to be in the flow. New practice members appear to just come out of the woodwork. Income seems to continue to rise. Your office is fun, profitable and has a unique identity in your community.

With compassion, you're not always comparing yourself to the DC down the street. Instead, you get excited about your own growth and life. When people reject your patient education, it's not a reflection on you. You don't get mad as you once did. You realize that you are only responsible for 50% of the relationship. If they want your help, they have to make a commitment to their health. There are no shortcuts. This is where so many people get sucked into the "illusions" of health that are promoted today.

Over the years, we used to ask for blessings for our various endeavors and innovations. When we would write a book or a new seminar series, we would ask various people around our offices (nuns, rabbis, priests, etc) to offer a special blessing for our new project. Our mentor, Dr. Joseph Flesia, once told us, let your life be your gift to the universe. It's God's work. It doesn't need to be blessed, because it's already blessed. When you live your life with a keen awareness of the sufferings and misfortunes of others, and you are willing to do something about it, you live a life worth living.

(The New Renaissance is a movement of passionate chiropractors dedicated to changing the world. The leader in patient education since 1977, the Mentor IV Coaching Program is a step‑by‑step navigational guide that embodies the very essence of The New Renaissance vision of healthier people creating a healthier world. Without patient education, your patients won't "get it." To learn more about The New Renaissance, contact world headquarters at 800‑525‑3879.)